Just a Game, Ch 1, The Crossing

The birds chirped happily to one another as Edward sauntered up the hilled path. His boots clacked on the dirt ground, and he recalled the way to his grandmother's home, lost in thoughts. Maria Ross was alive. Not only that, but saved by the Colonel and protected in Xing with his help. Who knew Mustang could be so soft when he wanted to?

Ed paid no mind to the blinding sun. While its reflection on the ground was bright, something else caught his attention. A cemetery to the left faced him with graves. Ed gazed longingly to the tombstone he knew best, only to find something in the way. Abruptly, Edward halted on the path and made a small sound seeing a visitor standing at the grave that was his mother's. The stranger was tall and wore a huge brown coat, but his back was turned so the only feature of his face was his gold hair, tied in a ponytail. The wind stirred Ed's hair as he stared at the stranger. The blond ponytail of the visitor stirred too.

A sudden image flashed in Edward's mind. One of a man sitting hunched over a desk in a dimly lit room. Alphonse stood next to him, watching the man write formulas on old scrolls among the potions in the room. Ed dared not believe his memory.

It can't be…

Another image flashed across his mind. This time of a photo where his mother smiled, cradling the young Alphonse in her arms, while Ed was held by a stranger with no face, hidden behind another photo. Now Ed began to suspect. His head rose to better see the stranger as the lines under his eyes creased.

Is it…?

Another memory. In a dark hall, he, his mother, and Alphonse observed as the same stranger with a blond ponytail and brown coat opened the front door. It creaked loudly as he walked out, flooding the area with light. The stranger did not look back.

But right now, the real version of the same man did look back. He looked straight at Edward, regarding him through as nonchalant eyes as ever. They squinted and drooped down, seeing Edward's face, and Ed continued to let the wind blow his bangs into his line of vision. He did not take his gaze off the man as he said something aloud – a name he hadn't heard in years.

"Hohenheim…"

~o-O-o~

The door squeaked open a half, a tall figure coming inside. Light from the hallway shined onto a bed, revealing Edward asleep. Hohenheim studied him, tentatively stepping closer. His gold hair spread across the pillows, his arms slung comfortably in front of him. He breathed heavily, in deep sleep. Was that really the same boy Hohenheim had seen as a toddler, giggling as he playfully grabbed his overalls? Van leaned over with his hands on his knees. He reached out with one hand to touch Ed's head – feel the rounded niche of his smooth crown and the warmth of his skin. But he didn't. He stopped halfway there, and pulled his hand back. He gazed at the open palm.

After a few minutes Hohenheim walked slowly out the door, sure to shut it as quietly as possible behind him. He disturbed Ed anyway as the door creaked back open, unknowingly waking him. Aware of Van's presence, Ed sat up in bed. He heard the muffled growls of Den as Pinako and Hohenheim talked in the next room. Ed listened closer as something they said piqued his interest.

"All these years and you look exactly the same," he heard Pinako say. Den's growls increased, making it harder to hear. Ed swung his legs off the side of the bed and ambled groggily to the door, hiding behind the wall as Pinako continued. "Where have you been all this time, why didn't you come back sooner? Trisha was waiting for you until the very end."

Like he cares, Ed thought, rubbing crust out of his eyes – he sounded cross even in his own head.

Suddenly Den's growls cut off and the patter of automail against the wood floor came toward the door.

Don't come over here! Ed commanded frantically.

As though Hohenheim knew Ed was eavesdropping, he changed the subject. "Pinako, the life form my sons transmuted… are you positive it was Trisha?"

Ed's panic shut off and the rage he'd felt earlier in the cemetery returned. What right does he have to ask about something like that? he thought angrily. What right does he have to know? Yet he listened.

Pinako hesitated. "Well I wouldn't… It didn't even look human to me," she said finally. "So I wouldn't think of it as –"

"No, that's not what I'm asking," Hohenheim interrupted. "Did you notice the eye color? Or the hair color?"

"What are you trying to get at?" Pinako asked, heat rising in her tone. "Are you telling me that wasn't even Trisha? For all that those boys sacrificed, you're saying that thing they created wasn't even their mother?"

Den nudged Ed's hand, but he didn't notice. He stared in horror through the wooded floor.

What?

Chairs scraped and their voices died away, but Ed stayed propped against the wall, unmoving.

What was he even saying? Of course that was their mother! It had to be! But creeping doubts slithered into his mind, trying to poison his past – or was it?

"Are you positive it was Trisha?"

If it hadn't been her, then who had it been? The thing had been alive, so someone must have been inside it! But who, if not their mother?

Think! Ed screamed, digging the heels of his hands into his eyes. Think back! Think back to that day! What did you see?

The image of chilling darkness came to his mind. Short, exhausted breaths rocked his body up and down as hot blood poured onto his hands. Then he heard wheezing and two silver dots appeared. It looked at him! The thing had looked straight at him!

Ed gritted his teeth, pushing his palms harder into his eyes. What more did you see? What more was there?

He tried to go back to the scene but it was too painful.

The floor moaned as someone came toward the room. Panicked, Ed lifted his sore face off his hands and dashed back to his bed, throwing the covers over himself. Den whined in confusion as Pinako came into the room to check on him. Seeing all was well, she re-shut the door and Den followed her out. The stairs creaked higher up the steps and away. Ed lay in bed thinking.

If that wasn't mom, who was it? he couldn't stop himself from asking.

After the one hundredth time Ed finally told himself to shut up and go to sleep since there was nothing he could do about it now.

He didn't sleep until hours later.

~o-O-o~

A faint light exuded in the distance. Ed's pace quickened as he gasped for breath, running toward it in the darkness. He screamed in despair, reaching with his one arm made of flesh.

"Give it back! You have to give my brother his body back! He's the only family I have!" His voice rose as he leapt forward. "I won't let you take it!"

"Take it?" came a chilling voice. The gleaming smile of the Truth popped out in front of him, upside-down. Ed stepped back in alarm. "Do you even know what you're saying?" Truth enquired, creeping a little closer. "You're the one who tossed his body aside and put him in that armor," it said. "Aren't you, alchemist?"

Ed gasped again, not believing his eyes. Another familiar voice came in the darkness and Ed spun to see Shou Tucker.

"It's true," Tucker mocked, sneering. "You and I are exactly the same. Accept it, Edward." Ed looked at the chimera of Nina slouched at Tucker's feet. "We make monsters."

Ed stepped forward to touch her, but suddenly black hands floundered around his face, and one grabbed his chin. It turned his head now on the glowing eyes of the horrid face Ed had seen long ago in his transmutation.

"Edward, why did you leave me here like this? You have to bring me back soon." The black hands of the Gate crawled up Ed's shirt as the mangled thing shrieked, "Promise me! Promise me! Promise… me…!"

"Stop!" Ed commanded, shoving his hands into his eyeballs to shut out the horrifying creatures. "Stop it!"

When Ed's eyes shot open, they were gone. He sighed in relief, but still the darkness remained. Ed turned around, searching for the light he'd seen earlier. A dark Gate loomed in its way. Ed cocked his head, unable to see the giant block of stone clearly enough to know what it was. Then its doors opened, shaking the darkness and rattling his whole body – Ed should have known better.

Realizing what it was, Ed gasped again and ran the opposite way. He knew it was no use. The hands clutched his arms and dragged him to their core, into the giant eye of the Truth.

What the hell is going on? Ed thought in his throbbing head. Why am I being sucked into the Gate when I didn't even transmute anything?

He clawed for a hold on the doors' edges, clamping his automail hand tight on the flat stone. "Oh, no you don't!" Ed bellowed cockily. Despite his shock and fear, he was more determined to get out. But the Gate was stronger, as it always was. His grip on the door slipped, and the hands charged him into the darkness.

~o-O-o~

This was not a normal trip through the Gate. Instead of the overwhelming, blurring, indecisive knowledge that usually swept over Ed, simply making him want to die, he felt like he was being shot through veils of web. And the farther he went through the layers, the lighter it got until he could no longer keep his eyes open without them burning.

Ed was beginning to believe it would never end when the light finally became low enough so he could see. When he peeked through his eyelids, he wished he hadn't. The sensation of falling, for ages, light-years, straight down to into bright nothingness. Ed began to yell as he tumbled, head over heels. Adrenaline and dread coursed through his veins, and he thought, I'm going to die! I'm definitely going to die!

With every spin, the scene got clearer and clearer. Landscape formed below him, trees sprang out of the ground, water stretched out of the vivid grass. Populations of animals roved across the fields.

There's an end! Yes! I may not die after all! And the only reason Ed didn't expect the inevitable was because the direction he was falling was straight toward the softest landing – the water. It got closer and closer, every moment etched into his brain. Ed didn't think he would ever forget this moment in all his life. He took the deepest breath he could muster from the chambers of his lungs, and shut his eyes.

And then he was two feet from the surface.

Ed plunged into the water head-first, the liquid bending around his body, as though caressing him in its grasp. Already his body begged for oxygen, but he could not give it. Unable to see, Ed started to bat his arms in the water. He climbed higher but something heavy held him down. He turned his head downward in the murky water.

His automail. Of course. Winry had always told him to never swim with it on, and he seemed to have disobeyed her at the worst time possible. Only this time it meant his life, not a swinging wrench to the head.

Still, Ed fought to get to the surface of the water. He flailed his arms more fervently than ever, staying in one place. Fatigue and lack of oxygen began to catch up, and Ed's humor couldn't help but crack a joke at the hopelessness of the situation.

I can't die like this! The Fullmetal Alchemist drowning from his own "Fullmetal" limbs? That's just pathetic!

The light near the surface started blinking out. Once. Twice. Three times, faster. Black dots danced on Ed's vision. He saw colorful fish swish across the surface of the water where the sun shone through.

I have to get there in time! I have to get there in time!

Bending light distorted around him, and Ed's face burst above the water, taking a relieved breath. He bobbed back under, but had gotten his bearings. He swam to the right, going fierce. Up and down, up and down on the water's surface. And finally he reached the shore.
Sopping wet and nearly dead, Ed dragged his feet to land. Without caring he collapsed on the grass, chest heaving as he panted.

"That… was… the best… workout… ever…" he declared between rasps.

And then, unexpectedly, Ed slumped over and went to sleep.